10 Years of Garbage Bags

Today is garbage day, and I am rolling out the last few white garbage bags I bought 10 years ago from Costco (I compost a lot!).  320 10-Gallon bags.

…and what we have been through together. 

We have seen long term relationships end, starting a new life living on my own for the first time, the sudden passing of family members, children getting married and breaking up, two major moves from one end of the province to the middle of the province, a Pandemic and an early retirement. 

So, how did I take care of myself and all those garbage bags during this time of grief and loss?  Understanding myself and knowing that people who are grieving, sad, depressed, or angry often struggle to communicate thoughtfully.  It is important to understand how each dimension connects with others and why communication can become more challenging.

Let’s look at how we sort our energy:

Introverts, initially, might withdraw or detach to process the information. They prefer to form conclusions subjectively before discussing with others.

Extraverts immediately seek to discuss events with friends and family. They prefer quick action and feel uneasy with delays. As they think aloud, their views may change through conversations.

Resourceful Oranges communicate actively and expressively during loss and grief, often crying, yelling, or running away. This behaviour, sometimes seen as disrespectful, is their way of coping. They may use strong language or act disruptively due to their struggle with acceptance and pain. Understanding these actions as reactions to loss is crucial.

Authentic Blues are open and genuine during loss or pain. They will cry.  They express their feelings and encourage others to share, prioritizing support for everyone. They may struggle with self-expression if they fear being misunderstood. They may require quiet time to recharge, and their generous nature often leads them to help others beyond their means.

When Organized Golds face grief or sadness, they instinctively try to fix things, as they are family caretakers. They quickly organize and manage the situation, relying on familiar tools like planners for a sense of purpose and grounding. It’s crucial not to interfere with their process; they need control to avoid feeling overwhelmed. During this time, they appreciate comfort, hugs, and meaningful words.

Inquiring Greens often internalize their emotions and shut down, which may offend others who see it as being ignored or devalued. This detachment is a coping mechanism for their deep hurt. They need time to process their feelings privately and will engage on their own terms.

Each person’s journey is unique and involves time, energy and a great deal of readjustment. It is the process that allows us to eventually accept the loss, resulting in letting go of our attachments and moving on to new attachments in the future.  I am buying 320 more garbage bags!  

By the way, the garbage bag item number at Costco is: 714389

Susan Patterson and her sister as dogs

Susan Patterson is a Personality Dimensions® Master Trainer, Business Owner, Retirement Coach, Author, and Workshop Facilitator. She is still running.  She can be contacted through LinkedIn at linkedin.com/in/susan-patterson9352663/

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